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The Nuptual Epidemic

January 19, 2010

I’m not sure about the rest of the world, but in my place in both time and geography something quite powerful is going around.  The symptoms are sometimes obvious, sometimes surprising, but always unstoppable once they begin. 

I’m writing, of course, about Weddings.

Now, being a twenty something means dealing with this new form of excitement in life, engagement rings popping up like popcorn in the microwave, your other friends just kernels in the bowl, turning slowly, about to burst at any moment.  It’s natural for newborn adults to want companionship in their exploration of this world of bills and decisions and responsibilities.  Plus, it is exciting and new to be in love in a real way, to feel for someone in a way you don’t think you could ever understand, and then to throw a big party and celebrate with your friends and family.  Who wouldn’t want this?  So I get that.  Really.

But, being new to the twentysomething group, I find myself a little shell shocked with all these engagements popping up.  As someone whose longest relationship was a matter of months, I find it difficult to understand a relationship that lasts for years, for decades…forever.  I’ve only just reached my 2nd decade, and after seeing the amount of change that I went through just in those two, I can’t imagine promising myself (whoever that is) to someone (whoever they are) for another 4 or 5.  That’s not even considering the massive divorce rate, the great schism that marks most peoples’ lives between wife #1 and wife #2. 

Ok, I’ll admit it.  I come from a “broken home,” so I may be a bit cynical about all this.  But from watching my parents divorce and then date from the time I was 12, I think I’ll take my cynicism, and my time, when and if I choose a partner.  My mom and dad and I started dating at the same time.  Imagine your mom asking you dating advice when you are 13, 14 years old… it changes the way you look at the process.  Through my parents’ dating experience, I’ve had just about every kind of relationship, and the only thing they’ve had in common was this:  they failed.  They’re both married again now, but it took them a really long time to get a place where they could be settled happily again. 

I think a lot of people today share something similar to my experience, and can relate to my feelings on the matter.  But then again, I might be wrong.  If relationships are a bowl of kernels, and engagements are the happy, fluffy, newly burst popcorn, usually I feel like the kid staring at the microwave, resting her head in her palm, just waiting, watching the turnstile spin the world around without my help.

Needless to say, the epidemic has hit.  And you could be next.

2 Comments leave one →
  1. Jenna permalink
    January 19, 2010 4:37 am

    ha! I’ve been meaning to write a post on this “epidemic” for days.
    I’m glad that you wrote the post instead. 🙂

  2. January 25, 2010 3:22 am

    i have so many weddings to go to this year, it kind of makes me sick.

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